Internet Lingo Explained!

Out there in the vast expanse that is the internet, a whole lot of words exist that aren't in dictionaries, and hopefully won't ever end up there. The purpose of this guide is to help you understand and use these words correctly.

1. Noob

I'm sure that many of my three readers have run into the use of the word "noob" on the internet at least several times. From what I understand and believe, the word "noob" originated from the compound and abbreviated word, "newb." "Newb" is believed to be an abbreviation for "New Beginner," which sounds kind of redundant. On the other hand, I suppose the only other kind of beginner is an old beginner, which abbreviated would be "oldb," which is much harder to pronounce. The word was then changed based on the common pronunciation, and became "noob." It has since devolved to words like "nub," or, to be more 1337*, "n00b." These words, in turn, have devolved into other words (see "nubcake").

Whether or not in can barely call itself a word, there is a correct place, time, and way to use it, and there are incorrect places, times, and ways to use it.

CORRECT USAGE
Correct usage of the word "noob" is fairly simple. In a situation where somebody tries something, and fails, noob is easily applicable.

VISUAL AIDE



Noob!


As you can see, this failure of a skateboarder has failed, and can therefore correctly be called a noob.

INCORRECT USAGE
Incorrect usage of "noob" happens all to often. If some unavoidable and unfortunate event befalls somebody, calling them a noob is incorrect.

VISUAL AIDE



Not a noob!


2. Woot

Woot, or w00t, was originally an acronym: "W.O.O.T." which stood for "We Own Other Teams." It was commonly used in team games, both before, after, and during the game, players would shout/type/say "W.O.O.T." to both bolster their team, and discourage the enemy. How effective it was/is remains for discussion, but either way, that is no longer what the word is used for. Nowadays ('cause that sounds pretty fancy) it's more often used when one person proves another wrong, or is just happy, or excited.

CORRECT USAGE

Woot can be applied to a lot of things. If somebody finishes college, or aces a test, or even just doesn't a fail a test, it is perfectly acceptable to put on facebook, or even say it.

VISUAL AIDE

There really is no visual aide for woot. Sorry.

INCORRECT USAGE

Woot should not be applied to bad things. For example, if Michael Jackson died, a the facebook status of a fan should not read, "Woot! Michael Jackson died!"

More coming soon, including
FAIL
and
1337

3 Reasons Why I Sometimes Hate Facebook

Normally, facebook is excellent tool for staying in touch with friends, or getting in touch with people you haven't seen for multiple years that you only vaguely remember. I have used facebook for both of these, and many more. Every once in a while, though, you just get something that just bugs you. Because of this, I have decided to write my first blog post in about 4-5 months. So here they are, 3 reasons why I sometimes hate facebook.

1. Overly Dramatic Status(s*)

More times then I can count, I have seen my facebook page covered with status after dramatic status. For example:




What? You "just dont no wat to du anymroe"? How horrible.

Is it just me, or does everybody else hate this, too? Seriously. I'm done with stupid things like this. If only there was an "un-like", or "un-join" link to groups or status(s*) like this, which leads me to my next reason...

2. The Lack of an "Un" button.

Have you ever seen ridiculously stupid things that just need to be punished in someway on facebook? That is to say, have you ever seen something like this:

Will you look at that? Another status.

Yeah. Now, if facebook were perfect, this wouldn't even be on it, but because it's not, we have to suffer. With a little addition from me, however, our collective suffering wouldn't last very long. Ah, here we go:

Statusing is a word, right?

As you can see, that is a clear improvement from before. Also, to any people that have been so horribly mislead to believe that Hannah Montana can/should sing, I pity you, then ignore you. Go be dramatic. Anyway, I really think that facebook should add these buttons. Let's start a group!

3. Stupid Groups

Facebook ≠ MySpace. This is a fact that all too many people seem determined to change with groups like, "Color Ur Facebook OMG SPARKLES!!!!" that seem to serve (almost) no purpose but to annoy me. But that's not the worst of them. There are groups like this:

Sure, that seems fine now, but let's scroll down to the members.



Good luck getting 8,000,000 members by 2010.

You see my point. Again, it could just be me, but it's not. It's things like this that make me fed up with facebook and want to mark the whole thing as swastika. Now there are good things about facebook, but right now, I don't feel like seeing them. Did you hear about William Bemister who died? His family tried to take down his facebook account, but they weren't allowed to.

That's all for now, but I promise to try to make another blog post soon (as in before 5 months.)

*I couldn't figure out how to pluralize a couple of words (status in particular) and decided to just put a(nother) s at the end of words I didn't know how to pluralize. So, if you see something like, "statuss," it is not a typo, it's a pluralized word.